I'd like to say I'm okay.
But I'm not.
I'd like to say i understand.
But i can't.
I'd like to say I'll accept things the way they are now.
But i won't.
I'd like to say I'll be strong.
But I'm not.
I'd like to die right now.
But god won't let me.
I'd like you to hold me and tell me this is all a dream,
But it won't happen.
Because, this is all reality.
Just that i can't face up to it.
I'd like to say i won't cry no matter what,
But why are these tears coming out?
I'd like to say i want you by my side always.
But its impossible.
The you who promised me not to leave me alone,
left.
"I love you".
These 3 simple words, won't exist anymore.
"I miss you" .
Won't be missed anymore.
Because, no matter " i love you" or " i miss you".
It doesn't matter anymore.
Maybe i was too naive.
"I love you", three simple words that anyone can say freely.
Without even meaning it.
Truth or lies,
I can't differentiate anymore.
My heart, is aching.
i've learnt something.
Nothing lasts forever.
Cause even forever,
Don't seem like long enough.
Well, they say.
You can't lose what you never had.
I guess its true.
You were never mine to begin with right?
Doubt and trust,
Which will it be?
I feel so..
Deceived, by god.
Thanks for taking me on a roller-coaster ride.
Thank you.
Thank you for doing this to me.
Thank you.
Thank you for hurting me over and over again.
THANK YOU.
I guess that's your Job.
Some Christmas this is.
This is so fcking unfair.
Seriously.

Sorry for lying, Clar.

I'm alright, i guess.